Not sure how your life has been, but there are so many things that have not gone as planned in my life.
Even when I tried my best, gave my all, planned for months, consulted with the best, prayed, fasted, and meditated on it day and night, things went wrong.
Like, terribly wrong.
I have had my share of wins. But, it’s hard to get over the losses sometimes.
It’s hard to look at your big plans go up in smoke.
It’s hard to face the people, who have been watching from the sidelines, after you assured them this was it.
It’s hard to accept the reality of what may never actually be your reality. But when you have that “get back up, sis” on the inside of you, what’s hard still gets done.
It’s not easy starting over after a setback, getting up after a hard fall, on bouncing back after you’ve been counted out, but you can do it and here’s how:
1. Release the past. Those could’ve, should’ve, would’ve’s will trap you in your feelings. Staying in your feelings will keep you from moving forward. And, not moving forward will keep you stuck right where you are. Let the loss go.
2. Reject negative thoughts. Thinking it’s too late, you have too many flaws, and holding yourself hostage to the mistakes of your past will keep you from seeing the possibilities. Practice thinking better about yourself. Create affirmations, seek therapy, dive into books on mindset, surround yourself with people who will speak life into you, when you can’t speak for yourself.
3. Figure out what tripped you up. Why did you fail, what made you fall, who hurt you, what are your fears…? Pull that stuff up so you can address it.
4. See yourself in the future. Get a clear picture of what you want to happen. Set some goals and make some plans. Create a vision for your life. One of my favorite prayers for this: “God, show me who I am.”
5. Start from scratch. Give yourself a clean slate. Trying to pick up where you left off may be an emotional trap. Do something new, something fresh, something you’ve never done before.
6. Build up your network. Surround yourself with other forward thinkers, movers, and hustlers. Vibe with the positive energy of positive people.
7. Don’t settle. Bouncing back can be hard. It’s going to require major changes. You may be really uncomfortable for a minute, but don’t settle for easy, safe, and comfortable. Don’t settle until you get what you want.